Nollywood actress, Juliana Olayode, has advised unmarried people against allowing concerns about sexual compatibility to influence their decision to have sex before marriage.
The actress, who is an advocate of sexual purity, said she regularly had conversations with people who expressed fears about marrying partners without first knowing what their sexual relationship would be like.
In a lengthy social media post on Saturday, Olayode said people approached her with questions, doubts and personal experiences concerning sex, relationships and Christian beliefs.
She admitted that some of the conversations involved subjects she would not ordinarily discuss with close friends or within her Christian circle.
“Sometimes, people say things I wouldn’t ordinarily say or use words that aren’t even in my vocabulary. Not necessarily because they’re wrong for expressing themselves, but because these aren’t conversations I would typically have within my regular circle or with my close friends,” she wrote.
According to her, one of the discussions centred on whether unmarried couples needed to see each other naked or have sex before marriage to establish sexual compatibility.
She said some people were concerned about issues such as physical compatibility, sexual satisfaction and the possibility of discovering problems after getting married.
Addressing the concerns, Olayode said the size of a man’s penis did not determine sexual satisfaction, adding that couples could learn about each other’s bodies and preferences after marriage.
“The size of a man’s penis does not determine sexual satisfaction,” she stated.
She added, “Marriage is not a sexual examination you must pass before you can confidently say yes to someone.”
The actress acknowledged that sexual intimacy was important in marriage but argued that compatibility involved more than physical attributes.
“Sex is important in marriage. Sexual compatibility matters. But I believe we sometimes place so much pressure on knowing everything beforehand that we forget that intimacy is also something couples grow into,” she wrote.
Olayode said couples could understand each other’s needs, communicate their preferences and discover what worked for them through patience and mutual understanding.
She also encouraged couples to seek guidance from Christian sex counsellors and qualified sex therapists during marriage counselling and in marriage.
The actress further argued that abstaining from sex before marriage did not mean couples would be unable to enjoy fulfilling sexual relationships after their wedding.
“Purity is not a guarantee of a perfect marriage. Having sex before marriage doesn’t guarantee sexual satisfaction either,” she said.
She explained that her advocacy for purity was rooted in her Christian faith rather than an expectation that abstinence would guarantee a trouble-free marriage.
“Purity is not a transaction where we abstain today in exchange for a perfect marriage tomorrow. We pursue purity because we love God, because we trust Him and because it is the life He has called us to live,” she wrote.
Olayode also criticised what she described as the tendency among some Christians to choose which biblical instructions to obey based on personal convenience.
She maintained that people could acknowledge different experiences without allowing them to determine their religious convictions.
“I am not judging anyone. I am not oblivious to the different experiences people have had. I simply believe that we can acknowledge people’s experiences without making those experiences the standard for our convictions,” she added.
Reaffirming her position, the actress declared, “And yes, SEX IS FOR MARRIAGE. I believe it, I talk about it, and I stand by it.”
She also maintained that sexual purity was not outdated or unrealistic but an invitation open to everyone.
